Coming Out
by missklainer
Summary: Santana finds someone unexpected standing by her side, as she struggles to accept herself and her feelings for Brittany.


Santana was in trouble with her feelings. She was depressed and the thought of seeing her best friend today was breaking her soul into tiny pieces. It was the first day at school and she wasn't ready to handle her emotions.

Last year, she had found the courage to admit herself that she had been in love with her best friend, Brittany. She was an innocent, childish girl, as cute as a button and as hot as hell at the same time. She had tried to persuade Santana coming up from the closet, couple of times. But Santana was scared. She was definitely one of the most beautiful, respected and fiercest girl at McKinley High. She was popular and also a Cheerio. Yet, deep inside she was completely insecure about her own sexuality and the reactions.

When Brittany had thrown that "Lebanese" t-shirt to her, she really had wanted to wear that on stage and dance with the girl she loved. But instead, she had chosen to sit and watch. And the junior prom... Santana sighed. Kurt's boyfriend Blaine Anderson had been singing "You are the girl, that I've been dreaming of ever since I was a little girl" like a boss, in front of the whole crowd. Oh, how she had envied to them! Their love, their courage, their everything! And there, she had been dancing with David Karofsky, trying to cover her true self.

And the time Brittany had told her "I love you. You're my best friend"... Her heart had sunk.

* * *

><p>The hot latina checked herself in the mirror once again, made sure that her eyebrows were perfect and closed her locker. The first Glee meeting of the year was about to start.<p>

Santana didn't make one of her fabulous entrances. Instead, she silently took an empty seat at the back row and started watching her friends with a reckless attitude. Brittany wasn't there - yet.

"Finn, just stand still. I really can't get it, you're a grown up man and you still can't button up your shirt properly!" petite brunette frowned.  
>"Come on Rachel, I was in a hurry. And it was because of Kurt."<br>"Yeah, I'm pretty sure honey"  
>"Because of me, what Finn?" Kurt raised his eyebrow.<br>Rachel giggled. Kurt shot a 'bitch please' look at his step-brother.  
>"It's not my fault that you went to your bed late last night and couldn't hear your alarm clock Finny"<br>"Why did you sleep late last night Finn?" Rachel asked innocently. However, the tall boy seemed uncomfortable and confused. Rachel snapped.  
>"No.. Don't tell me that.. FINN!"<br>"No, no, I swear on God!"  
>"Don't swear on God Finn! You were praying on a sandwich last year! Were you watching those movies again, right? Am I not enough for you?"<br>"Come on Rach...It's not like that!"  
>"Don't! Just, don't speak!" Rachel turned her back to Finn, still sitting on her seat. Santana giggled. "Of course you're not capable of satisfying him" she thought inside.<p>

Tina and Mike showed up holding hands, then Puck arrived, following his badass girlfriend Zizes like a little puppy. Santana rolled her eyes. Once upon a time, Noah Puckerman had been definitely the hottest and most feared boy at the school, also Santana's sex buddy. But the oversized girl was way too tough. Even tougher than him. Love at first sight. "Perfect combination!" she told herself.

Then her heart skipped a beat, seeing her blonde crush at the door with Mercedes.  
>Kurt rushed forward.<br>"Hi Britt!"  
>"Hi boo!" she kissed Kurt on his cheek.<br>"Here comes my boyyyy!"  
>"Aww, Mercedes I missed you so muchhh!" Kurt hugged her best friend tight. "It's like we haven't seen each other for weeks!"<br>"Except, we were together two days ago" Mercedes chuckled.  
>"Hey kids! Are you ready for this year? We've so much work to do!" Mr. Schuester greeted them, holding some papers.<br>"All I'm gonna say is I need more solos this year Mr. Schue!" said Mercedes, with her usual diva attitude. Rachel heaved sarcastically.  
>"Don't even try to mess with me Berry!" Mercedes turned to her.<br>"May the most talented win"  
>"We'll see"<br>"Guys, guys! Calm down!" Mr. Schue smiled. Santana's eyes were still on Brittany. The latina desperately hoped Britt to come sit next to her, but she was already sitting next to Tina. Their eyes locked for a second, the blue eyed girl responded her gaze with a faint smile. Santana turned her head to Mr. Schue. She didn't see her pouting like a little girl.

* * *

><p>"Sorry, I'm late!"<br>"Sweet baby Jesus!" Mercedes cried out, as the rest of the choir room gawked at the pink haired chick at the door. She was wearing a grunge tee with mini denim shorts and military boots.  
>"Wow Quinn, that's quite a change!" stated Mr. Schue.<br>"I'll take it as a compliment" she said simply and smiled to her friends.  
>"Punk chic" commented Kurt with admiring eyes. "Not for my taste but those denim shorts look simply gorgeous on you"<br>"You look like Kesha" Tina said.  
>Rachel pinched Finn's arm, as he kept staring at his ex jaw dropped.<br>"Wanky!"

After the little (!) shock, Mr. Schue begun talking about their new road map, song lists, their show plan, their rivals blah blah blah.. Santana wasn't listening. She was still looking at the lovely blonde and toying with her necklace. Britt was still staring Quinn's hair curiously. Santana couldn't help herself thinking about what Britt was thinking.  
>Just like any other girl, pink was Brittany's favorite colour and she was deeply obsessed about everything pink. She remembered the time Britt had been trying to feed Lord Tubbington with strawberry milk. When she had asked why, she had simply replied that "Strawberry milk will make his fur pink"<p>

* * *

><p>"Okay everyone, that's all for today. Next week, I want at least two different - and significant- ideas from you!"<br>"Bye Mr. Schue!"

Santana saw Brittany leaning closer to Quinn, sniffing her hair.  
>"It doesn't smell like strawberries"<br>"Wha- what?" Quinn spun and laughed at her friend's childish antics.  
>"It looks fluffy" the blonde one leaned forward and held one of her pink locks.<br>"Britt, don't.."  
>Finn bit his lip anxiously. Puck muttered "Shit!"<br>"What's going on?" Rachel asked, forgetting about their previous argument.  
>"You can't touch Quinn. Not like that. Especially her hair" Puck explained, lowering his voice.<p>

"What does it taste like?" Britt asked innocently and brought Quinn's hair closer to her mouth.  
>"What the hell!" Quinn pushed Brittany, a little bit too harsh.<br>"Whoaa whoaa! Don't lay a finger on my girl!" Santana leapt up.  
>"Are you a metamorphmagus?"<br>"Am I - what?"  
>"I watched Harry Potter. There was a girl with pink hair. She was born like that. She can change her hair whenever she wants. Does your baby have pink hair too?"<br>"ENOUGH! GROW UP BRITT! YOU IDIOT!"

It all happened so fast. Santana broke free from Zizes' strong arms, trying to attack Quinn.  
>"Bitch! You can't call her like that! I'm gonna rip your heart from your chest!" She was shaking in rage, her eyes were burning with madness. Brittany clung to Tina like a baby koala, pleading "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you" to Quinn and begged Santana to stop but she didn't. She couldn't. Quinn was aware of that she made a huge mistake too. Britt was always like that and she was her friend. She was also bullied with harsh words at school because of acting like a five year old but... "Santana stop!" she cried out.<br>"Apologize to her! NOW!"

Brittany just wanted to say that was fine, although she was really hurt. She didn't care what other people say but hearing the word "idiot" from a very close friend was too much for her. Just like Artie had done before.  
>"I.. I.. I just.. love.. p-p-pink.." she stuttered in tears.<br>"You know what? I hate all of you! All of you! We're the odds of this damn school and I thought that we were like a family! She sees you as her family! Can't you see? She's not an idiot! She's perfect in her own way! SHE'S FUCKIN' PERFECT! SHE'S BETTER THAN ALL OF YOU"  
>Santana stormed out, leaving her friends behind astonished.<p>

* * *

><p>Kurt walked down the empty hallway with cautious yet fast steps. When he arrived girls' bathroom, he turned his back and checked the corridor once again. The last thing he wanted was to be seen by Azimio and his teammates. He slowly opened the door.<br>"Santana?"  
>Silence.<br>"Santana, are you there?"  
>"Yeah.." A broken, faint voice was heard.<br>Kurt walked straight forward to the sobbing. He bended to find out which cabin was Santana in. She was hiding in the last one. He heard the sliding bar moving with an irritating, metalic sound.  
>Devastated latina was sitting on the closet, still crying and holding lapful of toilet paper. The fair boy kneeled down and looked at her friend indulgently. Santana's emotional breakdowns were not a shocking surprise. But Kurt knew that this time was different. He kept his silence.<br>Finally Santana spoke.  
>"I can't take it anymore Kurt"<br>"I know"  
>"No you don't know!"<p>

Kurt said nothing. After a few seconds of hesitation, dark haired beauty lifted her head and looked at her friend with dusky, damp eyes.  
>"I didn't mean that"<br>"It's okay Santana"  
>"It's.. It's just.."<br>"You love her. Right?"  
>"I do! But.. They won't accept me Kurt! Not in a million year!"<br>"Look at me Santana, just, shh.. Look at me" Santana was about to lose it again. Kurt held her hands.  
>"There's nothing wrong with you, there's a lot wrong with the world you live in. But you can't give up just because you're different. In a better way. Differences make us stronger. Remember, I was tossed into dumpsters, pushed against lockers, bullied every single day in every possible day. I used to think that I was going to die alone"<br>Santana was still silent.  
>"I know that your bitchy attitude is your own way to express your anger, your disappointment. You're using it to cover your true identity"<br>Kurt looked at her. She was so confused, so lost, so desperate for love and to be loved...  
>"Do you want to be happy Santana?"<br>"Yeah.. I do.."  
>"Then you should get rid of your mask. You have to embrace yourself and face the world. It's not gonna be sunshines and rainbows everyday.. But you'll be better"<br>"Are you happy Kurt?"  
>"I am" he nodded. "And peaceful"<br>"It hurts Kurt.. It hurts so much.."  
>Santana sighed and did something she had never done before. She hugged Kurt.<br>"You are the strongest girl I've ever met. Stronger than Zizes"  
>Santana let a broken laughter escape from her mouth.<br>Kurt pulled back and smiled widely at her.  
>"We're the Glee club. We're the odds. We're here for you no matter what"<br>"I'm a judgemental bitch Kurt. I was so mean to you. Why are you trying to help me? Why are you even here?"  
>"Because you matter"<p>

Both stood up. "Are you ready?" Kurt asked.  
>"No.. Not know.. I mean I've so many emotions right now, I need a moment to pull myself together"<br>"Santana... I'm talking about getting out of this place. Not coming out!"  
>"Oh.. Well.." The latina chuckled. "Sure. Just give me five minutes to freshen up"<br>"I'll go first. I don't want to be caught here!"  
>"See you tomorrow then"<br>"C'ya"

* * *

><p>Santana heard a buzz from her pocket.<p>

_Santy r u ok? I missed u xxx Britt_

She smiled and decided to call her back. It took a little bit longer than usual for Britt to answer.  
>"Hi Britt"<br>"Hi Santy. Sorry, I couldn't find the right key to answer"  
>"Honey, you have a sliding one"<br>"You're right..."  
>Santana hesitated. But Britt spoke again.<br>"I thought you would never want to talk to me again"  
>She bit her lip and asked "Why sweety?"<br>"You were so angry with me"  
>"No B, I wasn't mad at you. I was angry because of Quinn"<br>"She apologized"  
>"That's good"<br>"Santy?"  
>"Yeah baby?"<br>"Please take me home"  
>"Britt, where are you now?"<br>"I don't know. Second floor I guess. I'm confused"  
>"Just wait on the corridor. I'll be there in a second"<p>

Santana hung up and rushed.  
>She saw Britt leaning against the wall, waiting for her.<p>

"There you are!"  
>"I found myself in the wrong classroom"<br>"That's fine B. I'm here now. Let's go home"  
>Suddenly Britt embraced her.<br>"Don't leave me, okay?"  
>"Never"<br>"Promise?"  
>Santana pulled back and gazed into Britt's beautiful blue eyes. They were red and puffy. She held her hands.<br>"You know what? I'll never leave you. Ever. You're the only one for me. And from now on, you'll never be alone again. Understand? No matter what others say, I don't care. I just want to be with you. I'll hold your hand. Always"  
>"Like now?"<br>"Like now"

Santana came closer, so close that she could feel Britt's warm breath on her face. Her lips lingered over her temple, her damp cheekbones and stopped at the corner of her lips.  
>"I love you"<br>"I love you too"

Kurt was right.  
>It was peaceful...<p> 


End file.
